i am not the same person at 8am and 8pm
Need condoms? Right there in the fucking aisle in a supermarket or CVS.
Need female birth control? Nah bruh, need a prescription and the consent of the lord Jesus Christ amen
THE reason I don’t like marina
do you ever just use an emoticon or phrase ONCE and then all of a sudden it makes up 99% of your daily vocabulary
HEY I JUST MET YOU
AND THIS IS CRAZY
BUT HERE’S MY NUMBER
SO COME TAKE DOWN AN INTERNATIONAL NEONAZI TERRORIST ORGANISATION WITH ME
HOLY SHIT. MY NEIGHBOUR IS SCREAMING AT HER BOYFRIEND.
Yeah, the two that keep me up at odd hours of the night.AND I’M ONLY PICKING UP BITS AND PIECES BECAUSE HE’S NOT SHOUTING BUT I’M FAIRLY POSITIVE HE JUST TOLD HER HE’S GAY AND THAT HE’S BEEN CHEATING ON HER WITH HIS BOYFRIEND.
UPDATE. UPDATE. HE’S CHEATING ON HER WITH HER BROTHER.
SON OF A BITCH IT’S LIKE A BAD SOAP OPERA EPISODE.
You know sweatpants?
In Australia we call them trakky-dacks.
im starting to think you aussies are just fucking with us
we actually aren’t and that’s the horrendous part.
x men parody accounts are so important